What Your Partner Is Actually Thinking During Sex

Australia Drunkest Country In World

The world’s largest annual drug survey has ranked Australia as the drunkest country on the planet, with residents surveyed getting drunk an average of 27 times over the course of the year, almost double the global average of 15 times. What do you think? Read more from the Onion

Paparazzi Spot Timothée Chalamet Lounging On Mediterranean Yacht With Mystery 1,200-Foot Sandworm

SANTORINI, GREECE—After photographing the couple several miles off the coast of a secluded Greek isle, multiple paparazzi published images Friday of Dune star Timothée Chalamet lounging on a Mediterranean yacht with a mystery 1,200-foot sandworm. “Timothée rented a luxurious yacht for a vacation with his beautiful,… Read more from the Onion

Tim Duncan Claims He Has Helped Over 20,000 Women With Sensible Retirement Planning

SAN ANTONIO, TX—Coming clean about his off-the-court exploits during his 19 years in the NBA, former San Antonio Spurs power forward Tim Duncan reportedly claimed Thursday that he has helped over 20,000 women with sensible retirement planning. “In my playing days, every city we played in, I had at least a couple women… Read more…