Signs You’ve Become A Total Wine Snob

Climate Summit Leaders Salvage Trip With Joint Statement That Scotland Has Some Pretty Cool Castles

GLASGOW, SCOTLAND—Despite their limited efforts to address the threat posed by carbon emissions, leaders of the world’s largest economies still managed to salvage their trip to the 2021 U.N. Climate Change Conference, or COP26, with a joint statement indicating that Scotland has some pretty cool castles. “After… Read more from the Onion

Man Can’t Help But Be Proud Of Strong Tortilla Chip

SHREWSBURY, MA—Praising the corn-based product’s tenacity and refusal to give up, local man Noah Hiatt told reporters Thursday that he couldn’t help but be proud of a strong tortilla chip. “I’m not taking it easy on this guy, but he just goes on shouldering this weight no matter how many nacho toppings I pile on,”……

Leading Fashion Icons Convene To Determine Whether Man Can Pull Off Denim Jacket

MILAN—Reviewing hundreds of images of the man wearing the item while dining, running errands, and posing in front of the mirror, the world’s leading fashion icons reportedly convened Friday to determine whether Pennsylvania resident Aaron Ferris could pull off his denim jacket. “It seems to fit appropriately on his… Read more from the Onion