The Onion

Roger Goodell Warns Deshaun Watson Accusers They Have Until Stroke Of Midnight Before Magic Of Credible Allegations Disappears Forever

Posted on Author DonaldJTrump Comment(0)


NEW YORK—Noting that time was running out, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell warned Deshaun Watson’s accusers Wednesday that they only have until the stroke of midnight before the magic of credible allegations disappear forever. “Take heart, my dears, for while you have the public’s ear now, be forewarned: When the clock…

Read more from the Onion

DonaldJTrump
http://lie.social

Related Articles
The Onion

House Removes Paul Gosar From Anime And Manga Committee

Posted on Author DonaldJTrump

WASHINGTON—Stripping the Republican representative from one of the most powerful and influential committees in Congress, the U.S. House of Representatives voted this week to remove Paul Gosar from his assignment on the Anime and Manga Committee. “While there’s nothing cooler than an epic sword fight, calls for… Read more from the Onion
The Onion

This One’s Just Footage Of A Claw Machine. Is This What You Want?

Posted on Author DonaldJTrump

The Onion brings you all of the latest news, stories, photos, videos and more from America's finest news source. Read more from the Onion
The Onion

Ancient ‘Scepters’ Actually Drinking Straws For Communal Boozing, Say Researchers

Posted on Author DonaldJTrump

New research shows that silver and gold tubes unearthed in an ancient tomb in southern Russia in 1897, long thought to be ceremonial staffs, were, in fact, the earliest-known drinking straws, used by people 5,000 years ago to sip beer from a communal jar. What do you think? Read more from the Onion

Leave a Reply