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WASHINGTON—Nervously fiddling with their new white belts as they waited for their instructor in the training hall, U.S. Congress members reportedly prepared for another Jan. 6 on Thursday by participating in a group class at the D.C.-area True Method Karate Studio. “We simply cannot allow what happened last year to… Read more from the Onion
SAN DIEGO—In an effort to reduce fears and concerns about the loose jungle cat, the San Diego Zoo assured the public Friday that an escaped leopard would kill them quickly. “Rest assured that if you cross paths with this escaped leopard, you will be dead before you even think about being scared,” said zookeeper Lloyd……
‘Ship Them To Us And We Will Do As We Wish,’ Says CEO Bob Chapek Read more from the Onion