Unfortunately, men are pigs who will say just about anything to trick you into sleeping with them. Here are lies you should definitely watch out for before going home with some random guy at a bar.
Read more from the Onion
PORTLAND—Expressing a willingness to work with Portland on figuring out the best deal for both parties, Damian Lillard told reporters Wednesday that he has provided the Trailblazers with a list of 12,482 preferred trade destinations. “My list definitely includes the Lakers, the Nets, any Euroleague team, and every… Read more from the Onion
NEW YORK CITY—Calling the expense class warfare, local billionaire Kenneth Anderson was unfairly targeted Thursday with a 5% sales tax on a sandwich he was buying. “You’re singling me out with this indefensible charge because I’m wealthy, and I will not stand for it!” said Anderson, adding that being required to pay… Read more from…
Everyone else is already insulting you, the last thing you need is for your own brain to join in. Here are several self-deprecating comments that are actually really harmful. Read more from the Onion