The Onion

‘Let’s Clear Some Cap Space,’ Says Stone-Faced Bill Belichick Watching Players Dig Own Graves

FOXBOROUGH, MA—Standing in the freezing rain at a site adjacent to Gillette Stadium, a stone-faced New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick was heard to utter, “Let’s clear some cap space,” on Friday as he watched players dig their own graves. “This is always a difficult decision, but we’ve got to make some cuts and…

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