The Onion

Friendship Buckles Under Strain Of Single Sincere Moment

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NASHUA, NH—Indicating that the unfortunate occurrence had done irreparable damage, sources confirmed Friday that the friendship between local men Ben Cowsill and Jared Leon had buckled under the strain of a single sincere moment. Reports maintained that despite knowing one another for nearly 20 years, Cowsill and Leon…

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John Stockton Claims Covid Vaccine No. 1 Reason Athletes Fail To Win Single Championship

Posted on Author DonaldJTrump

SPOKANE, WA—Saying it played a “dangerous role” in denying perennial all-stars the rings they clearly deserved, Hall of Fame NBA guard John Stockton claimed Wednesday that the Covid-19 vaccine was the No. 1 reason athletes failed to win a single championship. “We have no idea what is in this thing, but it’s obviously… Read more…

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