The Onion

Centrist NFL Fan Spends Sunday Rooting For Line Of Scrimmage

MADISON, NJ—Wildly celebrating after the line held its ground on a 3rd and 2, centrist NFL fan Brian Ducklo reportedly spent all day Sunday rooting for the line of scrimmage. “These radical fans on either side don’t understand that the real important thing is where the ball is, and it shouldn’t move too far past the…

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