The Onion

Cash-Strapped Planned Parenthood Forced To Sell Fetus Bulldozer

NEW YORK—In a desperate move to stabilize the nonprofit organization amid continual threats to its funding, Planned Parenthood announced Monday that in order to shore up its finances it had been forced to sell its fetus bulldozer. “While it is unfortunate to get rid of an essential piece of machinery that helps with…

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