Look, gamers, we hate social studies quizzes as much as the next guy, but it would be in all of our best interests if we just kept our heads down and got it done as soon as possible. Why, you ask? Were you even listening? Mrs. Thompson said we might get to play Minecraft if we can all finish by 11:45.
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WALDORF, MD—Vowing not to repeat the same mistakes of years past, sources confirmed Wednesday that the Stanchfield family was saving time this Thanksgiving by making their oak dining table the day before. “Grandma insists it’s better fresh, but making everything ahead this year is going to save a whole lot of stress,”… Read more from…
BETHESDA, MD—Singling out the behavior as one of the leading risk factors for premature mortality, a report published Monday by the National Institute of Health confirmed that over 90,000 Americans die every year from living the way you do. “Our research shows that thousands in this country die needlessly from… Read more from the Onion