The Onion

Archaeologists’ Discovery Of Skeleton From 2.7 Years Ago Sheds No New Light On Anything

RIVERSIDE, CA—In a meaningless discovery of no consequence whatsoever, archaeologists at the University of California, Riverside, announced Friday that their recent excavation of skeletal remains belonging to a human who walked the earth 2.7 years ago shed absolutely no new light on anything. “After conducting…

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